Coaching to live your best life

Why Acceptance Is So Important

Acceptance of one's life has nothing to do with resignation; it does not mean running away from the struggle. On the contrary, it means accepting it as it comes, with all the handicaps of heredity, of suffering, of psychological complexes and injustices. Paul Tournier

I love acceptance, it's one of the most important steps I can take in order to heal my life. It has not always been that way, there were times when I did not want to accept anything that was not to my liking. Life was painful then, to say the least.

Not wanting to accept things is like fighting reality. Fighting reality is painful. Acceptance is a huge part in 12 step programs. The serenity prayer says it all: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

A little excerpt from AA's big book about acceptance

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing….some fact of my life unacceptable to me.

And I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.

Unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in my attitudes.

For me the courage to change means that I should not try and change other people, but that I should focus on changing myself. What a concept! Acceptance is empowering and practicing it will heal yourself and your life. If you don't know how to do it right now you can learn it, or better said practice it. I had to learn the hard way. Nothing in my life was working and I did not want to accept the fact that I was powerless over my circumstances and all the crazy people in my life.

I wanted to control it all, but eventually, I just could not do it anymore. I let go and accepted that I cannot control the things around me. I could only control my thinking, my actions and that's about it.

I was free, I was free of trying to control everything. The moment I understood, I felt as if a heavy load was lifted off my shoulders. As soon as I started to accept things for what they are, I would feel better. If this is a new concept for you, it's worthwhile to try it.